NetHarry
by Muchcoffee
Summary: A summary of the HP series in NetHack form  each chapter is one HP book .  T for all the NetHack-style dying.  Please review!


Seriously, you will not understand the point of this story AT ALL unless you have played NetHack (so I won't be expecting chapterly reviews from you, Amela333! But I WILL from you, ASF13957!)

Just to let you know, I went through a LOT of NetHack games to get all the exact wording, so if you see any mistakes, PLEASE tell me!

Disclaimer: I don't own either Harry Potter or NetHack. I tried to come up with a more interesting disclaimer, but I failed. For this I apologize.

Please review! I'm not sure there are too many HP-fanfic readers here who play NetHack, so if you are one, I would really appreciate hearing from you. Hope you enjoy!

* * *

It is written in the popular series by J. K. Rowling:

After his school years, the cruel wizard Voldemort rose up against the rest of the world. He split his soul into seven horcruxes and hid them in the dark cavities of Snape's Dungeon, the Unwanted Classroom, where Snape now lurks, and bides his time correcting homework.

Your god Rowling seeks for you to possess the horcruxes, and with them to destroy the Dark Lord Voldemort.

You, a wizard-in-training, have been heralded from birth as The Chosen One. You are destined to destroy Voldemort for the freedom of your world, or die in the attempt. Your hour of destiny has come. For the sake of us all: Go bravely with Rowling!

Hello Harry, welcome to NetHack! You are a neutral male human Wizard.

You see beside you a kitten named Ron.

You walk west.

You see here a scroll labeled FOR MR HRYY POTTIR

You pick up the scroll.

t - a scroll labeled FOR MR HRYY POTTIR

r – **What do you want to read? [i-mt or ?*] t**

As you read the scroll, you feel more knowledgeable about your acceptance at Hogwarts.

You walk north.

You see here a door.

You try to open the door.

**o - In what direction? 6**

The door opens.

You see to the north a Vernon.

You hit the Vernon. The Vernon bites!

Ron misses the Vernon. The Vernon bites! The Vernon just misses Ron.

You cast a spell of force bolt.

**a – In what direction? 8**

The spell hits the Vernon! You kill the Vernon!

You see to the south a Petunia.

You miss the Petunia. The Petunia bites! Ron bites the Petunia. The Petunia is killed! Ron eats a Petunia corpse.

You see to the north a Dudley.

The Dudley runs away!

You walk north. You turn east. You walk east.

You stop. Ron is in the way!

You walk east.

You see here a door.

You try to open the door.

**o - In what direction? 6**

This door is locked.

**k - In what direction? 6**

As you kick the door, it crashes open!

You enter Diagon Alley.

You walk east. You walk south.

You see here a phoenix-feather wand.

You pick up the phoenix-feather wand.

c - a phoenix-feather wand.

**w - What do you want to wield? c**

c – a phoenix-feather wand (weapon in hand).

You see here a Gringotts Bank.

**l - There is a Gringotts Bank here, loot it? [ynq] (n) y**

You carefully open the Gringotts Bank...

o - take something out of the chest.

a - all types.

a - 3057 gold.

You walk south.

You walk south through a doorway. You walk south.

You see here a door.

**o - In what direction? 2**

The door resists!

**o - In what direction? 2**

The door opens.

You enter Hogwarts.

You walk east.

You see here a tripe ration.

You pick up the tripe ration.

o - a tripe ration.

You see to the west a Hermione.

**t - What do you want to throw? [$a or ?*] o**

**In what direction? 6**

The Hermione devours a tripe ration.

Suddenly, a trap door opens up under you!

You see no doors around you. You search.

ssssssssss

You walk west

ssssssssssssss

You see here a Mirror of Erised.

You see to the south a Quirl.

The Quirl hits!

You cast a spell of love.

**In what direction? 2**

The spell hits the Quirl! You kill the Quirl! Welcome to experience level 2.

You are beginning to feel hungry.

You see here a Quirl corpse.

**There is a Quirl corpse here; eat it? [ynq] (n) n**

You don't have anything to eat.

You walk west. You walk east.

Wizard needs food, badly!

You see here a Quirl corpse.

**There is a Quirl corpse here; eat it? [ynq] (n) y**

You feel sick. This Quirl corpse tastes terrible! You finish eating the Quirl corpse.

You see to the east a Dark Lord.

The Dark Lord hits! The Dark Lord bites!

You hit the Dark Lord. You destroy the Dark Lord!

* * *

Well, of course you didn't destroy him permanently. If I had been able to condense the series into one chapter, I would have, but there's just too much there, and since long chapters DO intimidate me, I decided to split it up. Rest of the chapters coming moderately soon! Please review!


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